12 wedding speech ideas and tips on how to write the perfect wedding toast
- George Polgar
- 7 hours ago
- 6 min read
Let's be honest. For most people, the idea of giving a wedding speech sits somewhere between "slightly terrifying" and "I suddenly feel unwell". Sweaty palms, dry mouth, and a deep fear of accidentally offending someone's grandmother are all very normal. The good news? Great wedding speech ideas aren't about being a professional comedian or poet. This article is about how to write and deliver a wedding speech that feels natural, meaningful, and genuinely enjoyable to listen to.
Our clear stance: simple, honest speeches always outperform long, over-polished performances.
Key Takeaways
A strong wedding speech is personal, clear, and easy to follow.
A simple structure beats clever improvisation every time.
A few thoughtful moments matter more than trying to impress.
Quick navigation // Table of Contents
What is the best opening line for a wedding speech?
What do you say for a wedding speech?
How do you end a wedding speech?
Can I use humour in a wedding toast?
What should I avoid saying in a wedding speech?
Wedding Speech Basics
A wedding speech and a wedding toast are closely related, but not identical. A speech is usually a few minutes long and tells a small story. A toast is the final moment where everyone raises their glass to the couple. Most speeches naturally end with a toast.
There is a fairly standard order at many weddings. Traditionally, the father of the bride or parents speak first, followed by the groom, and then the best man. Maid of honour speeches are now just as common and often appear alongside or instead of the best man. (Learn more about Wedding Speech Order in NZ: What's Traditional (and What Can You Change)?)
Typical speakers include:
Best man
Maid of honour
Parents of the couple
The couple themselves
If you're unsure about timing or order, it's always worth checking with the couple or the MC.
How to Prepare Your Wedding Speech
The biggest mistake people make is starting too late. The best wedding speech ideas usually come from giving yourself time to think, write, and refine. Even a rough draft a few weeks out makes everything easier.
Know your audience. A room full of friends allows for more humour. A mixed crowd of family members may call for a gentler tone. Choose a style that feels like you: funny, heartfelt, sentimental, or relaxed.
Keep it appropriate. If only three people in the room understand a joke, it probably doesn't belong in the speech. Aim for inclusive stories that most guests can follow and enjoy.
Structure Your Speech: A Simple Template
A clear structure removes most of the stress.
Opening: Greet the guests and thank the couple for the honour of speaking.
Middle: Share one or two short stories, memories, or observations about the couple.
Closing: Offer well wishes and lead into the toast.
Timing tip: three to five minutes is ideal. Long enough to feel meaningful, short enough to keep attention.
12 Wedding Speech Ideas
1) Start with a Strong Opening Line
Your first sentence sets the tone. It doesn't need to be clever. It just needs to sound confident and human.
Examples:
A warm thank you
A simple introduction
A light, gentle joke
Avoid long backstories. Get to the point quickly.
2) Share a Personal Memory
Choose one meaningful memory that shows who the couple really are. A small moment often works better than a dramatic story.
Focus on why that memory matters. What does it say about their relationship?
3) Introduce the Couple
If you know them separately, explain how you met each person. If you know them as a couple, talk about what stands out when they're together.
This helps guests connect emotionally, even if they don't know the couple well.
4) Use a Theme
A simple theme ties everything together. Examples:
Travel
Friendship
Growing together
Lessons about love
Refer back to your theme once or twice during the speech.
5) Include a Touch of Humour
Light humour is one of the most popular wedding speech ideas for a reason. It helps break the ice and makes your speech feel relaxed and natural. Think smile, not stand-up routine.
Gentle teasing is fine. Embarrassing stories are not.
6) Quotes & Sayings
A well-chosen quote can say in one sentence what might take you a full paragraph to explain. Whether you lean romantic, funny, or thoughtful, quotes work best when they support your message rather than replace it.
Choose something short, easy to understand, and relevant to the couple. If you need to explain what the quote means, it's probably not the right one. One strong line is more powerful than three average ones.
7) Show Gratitude
Weddings don't happen in a vacuum. Behind every celebration is a group of people who helped make it possible. Taking a moment to thank parents, organisers, and anyone who supported the couple adds warmth and generosity to your speech.
Keep it simple and sincere. A few genuine words feel far more meaningful than a long list of names.
8) Acknowledge Family & Loved Ones
Many couples want to recognise important family members, including grandparents or loved ones who are no longer present. This can be one of the most emotional moments of a speech when handled gently.
A short, respectful mention is enough. You don't need to tell a full story – just acknowledge their importance in the couple's lives.
9) Speak Directly to the Couple
Shift your body toward the couple and look at them when you speak. Using their names instantly personalises your words and creates connection.
These moments often become the emotional highlight of the speech, because the focus is clearly on love, not performance.
10) Share Advice for Marriage
You don't need to offer life-changing wisdom. Simple truths tend to land best: communicate openly, choose kindness, and keep laughing together.
Think of advice as encouragement rather than instruction.
11) Use Props (Optional)
Props can be memorable when they genuinely add meaning. A childhood photo, a letter, or a small object connected to a story can work beautifully.
If it feels forced or complicated, skip it. Your words matter more than any object.
12) End with a Toast
Let guests know you're wrapping up. Pause, smile, and invite everyone to raise their glass.
Keep the toast short and positive.
Clear ending, warm wishes, done.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
One of the fastest ways to lose the room – even when using great wedding speech ideas – is speaking for too long. Aim for three to five minutes and practise once or twice out loud.
Avoid embarrassing stories, anything that could hurt feelings, or jokes that rely on inside knowledge. Also, be mindful of alcohol consumption before speaking – nerves plus alcohol rarely improve delivery.
Stick to kindness, clarity, and brevity, and your speech will land exactly as it should.
And one last thought – a great wedding speech isn't just something you hear once. It becomes part of your story. The laughter, the pauses, the emotional glances, the reactions in the room – these are the moments that often end up meaning the most when you look back.
As wedding filmmakers and photographers, we see how powerful these speeches become when they're captured naturally and honestly. If you're putting this much care into your words, it's worth having them preserved in a way that lets you relive them for years to come. Contact us, we're happy to help.
FAQ
What is the best opening line for a wedding speech?
A simple, confident opening that thanks the couple and introduces who you are works best. You can add a light, friendly comment to break the ice.
What do you say for a wedding speech?
Share one or two personal memories, say something kind about the couple, and finish with well wishes and a toast. Keep it honest and easy to follow.
How do you end a wedding speech?
Signal that you’re wrapping up, invite everyone to raise their glass, and offer a short, positive toast to the couple.
Can I use humour in a wedding toast?
Yes, light and respectful humour works well. Avoid embarrassing stories or jokes that could make anyone uncomfortable.
What should I avoid saying in a wedding speech?
Avoid inside jokes, overly personal stories, offensive humour, and anything that could hurt feelings. When in doubt, leave it out.
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 | I’m George, the filmmaker and creative partner behind Red Guy Films — I create cinematic wedding films full of emotion and meaning. I began my career in television and advertising back in 2005, and I’ve been telling real stories ever since. |
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